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"Toxic Masculinity Awareness Day"

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flyangler

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Have you heard this yet?*

 

Father’s Day Updated To 'Toxic Masculinity Awareness Day'

 

WASHINGTON, D.C.—In a special session called to order Friday, Congress voted along party lines to do a complete overhaul of Father’s Day, renaming the holiday “Toxic Masculinity Awareness Day” and redefining the day’s meaning to encourage citizens to heap shame and disgust on all fathers, current or potential.

 

Americans across the country excitedly prepared to celebrate the updated holiday designed to shame fathers and all things masculine as the weekend approached.

 

“It was just time,” said House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, citing the high numbers of depression and anxiety among men as “a good sign things are progressing in the right direction, but we still have a lot of work to do before all men, everywhere do the right thing and hate themselves with the appropriate level of vehemence.” The new initiative seeks to have all men wailing in the streets in sackcloth and ashes, flagellating and weeping with shame and regret for their harmful, problematic masculinity.

 

The rewritten holiday guidelines suggest cancelling any gift orders for cigars or plans to take dad out for steak and instead sitting dad on the floor in the living room and repeatedly shaming him for being part of the problem, saying things like “Take that money you were going to spend on a beard trimmer and instead donate it to women’s rights.”

 

The government also established an associated website, ToxicFathersDay.gov, where you can download a free card to give your father that reads, “This isn’t your day any more. Do better.”

 

Other gift suggestions include an endangered fish donation in your father’s name, pouring out beer for those affected by toxic masculinity, and tickets to a male reeducation ceremony held deep in the Cascade mountain range.

 

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Is this so far-fetched in the current age?

 

 

 

* Adapted from item originally published in 2018 in The Babylon Bee, a satirical publication.

“No nation in history has survived once its borders were destroyed, once its citizenship was rendered no different from mere residence, and once its neighbors with impunity undermined its sovereignty.”

- Victor Davis Hanson 

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6 hours ago, PlumFishing said:

Perhaps this would be a good time to post your op-ed in the NYT about the emasculation of macho male culture?

You are fixated by that idea as this is second or third time requesting my doxing myself. 

 

I just reread it, reminded it was short, but it has aged well over 14 years. Made the point that if Hollywood spent less time lecturing (from a leftward perspective), maybe they would avoid alienating a large part of their potential attendees.

 

I never mentioned gender nor emasculation, those are your imagination. 

 

Here's the article that spurred me to write them, just insert the NYTimes prefix: 

 

/2005/08/24/movies/summer-fading-hollywood-sees-fizzle.html

“No nation in history has survived once its borders were destroyed, once its citizenship was rendered no different from mere residence, and once its neighbors with impunity undermined its sovereignty.”

- Victor Davis Hanson 

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Not to be Outdone, Elizabeth Warren Promises to Cure Smallpox:  “‘We will fend off the smallpox attacks of the white man,’ she said while sipping ‘fire water’ in a live video posted to her social media accounts. ‘If I am elected, I will find a way to end this scourge on our people and send the white devils back across the great sea where they came from.'”

 

“No nation in history has survived once its borders were destroyed, once its citizenship was rendered no different from mere residence, and once its neighbors with impunity undermined its sovereignty.”

- Victor Davis Hanson 

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8 mins ago, tomkaz said:

Not to be Outdone, Elizabeth Warren Promises to Cure Smallpox:  “‘We will fend off the smallpox attacks of the white man,’ she said while sipping ‘fire water’ in a live video posted to her social media accounts. ‘If I am elected, I will find a way to end this scourge on our people and send the white devils back across the great sea where they came from.'”

 

 

OK, now ThAT was funny.  

.

 

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2 hours ago, 55555s said:

 

OK, now ThAT was funny.  

The unfunny thing is that Snopes had “debunked” Bee stories a couple of times, seemingly ignorant that the entire site is satire. 

“No nation in history has survived once its borders were destroyed, once its citizenship was rendered no different from mere residence, and once its neighbors with impunity undermined its sovereignty.”

- Victor Davis Hanson 

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22 mins ago, tomkaz said:

The unfunny thing is that Snopes had “debunked” Bee stories a couple of times, seemingly ignorant that the entire site is satire. 

Ummm....I think you have that backwards. They debunked it because some people were so ignorant, they thought it was true. 

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17 mins ago, The Dude said:

Ummm....I think you have that backwards. They debunked it because some people were so ignorant, they thought it was true. 

Snopes is only considered a credible “fact checker” by liberals. So if your core audience are liberals, and you find the need to “debunk” an obscure and declared satire site’s “work”, what are you saying about the intelligence of your core audience? 

 

My favorite might be the time Smopes had to “debunk” a BB story claiming CNN bought a giant washing machine so they could “spin the news cycle”. 

 

image.jpg.76126d9c6c1867a5432f87b353b790c2.jpg

Edited by tomkaz

“No nation in history has survived once its borders were destroyed, once its citizenship was rendered no different from mere residence, and once its neighbors with impunity undermined its sovereignty.”

- Victor Davis Hanson 

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58 mins ago, fish'nmagician said:

I love right wing snowflakes who think they are alpha males with toxic masculinity.

I'll file this under things liberal women say.....

 

Whatyagonna do magish.  MEN ....You cant live without em though.

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