BrianBM

New Platform for SOL coming; joke consequences

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On 4/10/2017 at 9:51 PM, BrianBM said:

As most posters here have probably noticed, TimS is planning another change of platform.  Huddler, vBulletin, none of them earn his affection for long.  I think he gets unhappy when he has no reason to pull his hair out. 

 

As long-time posters know, this Forum has always required a joke from new posters.  Failure to tell one can result in knot failure, wind loops, and (for repeat offenders) breaking wind in the presence of attractive women, all of which can be visited upon the noncompliant by myself as Moderator in this Forum (only this one; the sanction app has been buggy, and it hasn't been extended to other Forums.)  Normally the IRS deadline of April 15 is the deadline, though this year it was moved to April 18.  With the usual month's grace period, if you are new here and have not yet submitted a joke, your deadline is May 18.

 

The relevance of this is that with the new platform, some of these sanctions will be automated, and I'm not sure if I can override the application if you don't get it done.  I'll pin this warning up for awhile, so everyone notices.  If you're a new guy, pay attention.

 

It so happens that I have an immediate need for jokes I can tell to two bright third graders, one male and one female.  I therefore request that posters in this thread supply me with age-appropriate humor for that generation.

I ain't telling no stoopid JOKE and I'll fart any place I please, even upwind.

 

carpet-smell.png

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Got this from a friend

 

 One evening, after the honeymoon, Tom was working on his Harley motorcycle in  the garage. His new wife was standing there by the bench watching  him. 
    
After a long period of silence she finally said,  "Honey, I've just been thinking, now that we are married, maybe it's time
you quit spending so much of your time out here in your garage. You probably should also consider selling your Harley and all your welding equipment along with your gun collection and your fishing gear, the boat and all those stupid model airplanes, plus dump that vintage hot rod sports car and your home brewing equipment. 
       
Tom got a horrified look on his face. She said, "Darling, what's wrong?  He replied, "There for a minute, you were starting
to sound like my ex-wife! "Ex-wife!?" she screamed, "YOU NEVER TOLD ME YOU WERE MARRIED BEFORE!" 
 
Tom replied,"I wasn't."

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1 hour ago, bonefishdick said:

Got this from a friend

 

 One evening, after the honeymoon, Tom was working on his Harley motorcycle in  the garage. His new wife was standing there by the bench watching  him. 
    
After a long period of silence she finally said,  "Honey, I've just been thinking, now that we are married, maybe it's time
you quit spending so much of your time out here in your garage. You probably should also consider selling your Harley and all your welding equipment along with your gun collection and your fishing gear, the boat and all those stupid model airplanes, plus dump that vintage hot rod sports car and your home brewing equipment. 
       
Tom got a horrified look on his face. She said, "Darling, what's wrong?  He replied, "There for a minute, you were starting
to sound like my ex-wife! "Ex-wife!?" she screamed, "YOU NEVER TOLD ME YOU WERE MARRIED BEFORE!" 
 
Tom replied,"I wasn't."

As one of our resident Angler Emerituses (Emereti?), TimS and I long ago agreed that you would be exempt from the automated knot-failure .exe that runs on the tackle of participants in this Forum.  Your contribution is nonetheless valued. 

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16 mins ago, BrianBM said:

As one of our resident Angler Emerituses (Emereti?), TimS and I long ago agreed that you would be exempt from the automated knot-failure .exe that runs on the tackle of participants in this Forum.  Your contribution is nonetheless valued. 

if only my knots could read :naughty:

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