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TAKING IT BACK - WISHFUL FICTION

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I RECENTLY CAME ACROSS THIS SHORT STORY BY AN ANONYMOUS AUTHOR. I THOUGHT THE MEMBERS COULD RELATE....

      IT WAS SOMETIME IN THE 70'S THAT THE BROTHERS DISCOVERED THE PHENOMENAL SURF FISHING ON CAPE COD.THEY HAD SOMEHOW STUMBLED ONTO NAUSET BEACH AND SOON BECAME OBSESSED WITH NIGHT FISHING CHATHAM INLET TO NAUSET INLET AND ALL POINTS IN BETWEEN. OVER THE YEARS, THEY PLUGGED AND EELED THEIR WAY FROM ORLEANS THROUGH EASTHAM, WELLFLEET, TRURO AND ON TO P'TOWN.

    LIFE WAS GOOD AND IT SOON BECAME SO MUCH MORE THAN CATCHING STRIPED BASS. EATING, SLEEPING AND LIVING ON THE SAND BECAME THE BEST PART OF THEIR LIVES. MEETING SOME GREAT FRIENDS AND SHARING ADVENTURES WITH THEM WAS ALSO A BIG PART OF THIS TRULY WONDERFUL EXPERIENCE. THE FREEDOM TO RUN THE BEACH WAS THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF THIS LIFESTYLE.

   AND THEN CAME THE BIRDS! AND THEN CAME ALL THE RULES AND THE MILES AND MILES OF SIGNS AND TWINE AND BEACH CLOSINGS. EVERYONE COMPLAINED, WROTE LETTERS AND ATTENDED HEARINGS AND MEETINGS - AND IT JUST GOT WORSE AND WORSE.

   THAT IS WHEN THE BROTHERS "FINBAR AND T-BONE" DECIDED SOMETHING HAD TO BE DONE. FINBAR HAD NOTICED THAT THEY ONLY SHUT THE BEACHES DOWN WHEN THE FIRST BIRDS ACTUALLY HATCHED. THEY EVEN HAD THE BIRD PEOPLE WATCHING EVERY NEST, WAITING FOR THE BLESSED EVENT. SO....WHAT IF THEY NEVER HATCHED? T-BONE, A FORMER MARINE, WANTED TO GO ON NIGHT RECON AND CRUSH THE EGGS. FINBAR, THE THINKER, KNEW THEIR HAD TO BE A BETTER WAY. THEY HAD TO PREVENT THE HATCH WITHOUT LEAVING ANY EVIDENCE OF TAMPERING. AND SO, A PLAN WAS "HATCHED".                                                                                               IT WAS JUST AFTER MIDNIGHT ON A COOL MIDWEEK NIGHT IN MAY WHEN TWO SILENT FIGURES CROSSED THE HIGHWAY AND DISAPPEARED OVER THE DUNES HEADED FOR THE ABANDONED BEACH.THEY WERE DRESSED IN SAND/CAMO AND CARRIED ONLY BACKPACKS AND NECKLIGHTS. IN THE BACKPACKS WERE A COUPLE ENERGY BARS, SOME BOTTLED WATER AND SEVERAL FREON TYPE FIRE EXTINGUISHERS. THE PLAN WAS TO FLASH-FREEZE THE EGGS. THIS WOULD ALMOST CERTAINLY STOP THEM FROM HATCHING AND, HOPEFULLY, THE PARENT BIRDS WOULD CONTINUE TO SIT ON THEM RATHER THAN RE-NEST AND LAY NEW ONES.THE BROTHERS ALSO HOPED THE FREON WOULD NOT LEAVE ANY EVIDENCE OF TAMPERING.

    THERE WERE A TOTAL OF 13 NESTS WHICH, THANKS TO THE BIRDOPHILES, WERE EASILY FOUND CENTERED INSIDE THEIR PROTECTIVE CAGES. THEY CAREFULLY LIFTED THE CAGES AND SPRAYED EACH EGG FOR 10 SECONDS. AS THEY BACKED AWAY FROM THE NESTS, THEY BRUSHED THE SAND SMOOTH. THEN FINBAR(THE THINKING ONE), MADE FOX AND RACCOON TRACKS WITH SOME FEET HE HAD ACQUIRED FROM A TAXIDERMIST FRIEND. ONCE THE DEED WAS DONE, THE BROTHERS HIKED OVER THE DUNES AND ACROSS THE HIGHWAY TO THEIR HIDDEN TRUCKS. IT WAS ALMOST DAYBREAK AND THE TIDE WAS LOW INCOMING WITH A BUILDING SOUTHWEST WIND. AS TIRED AS THEY WERE, THESE CONDITIONS WERE JUST TOO GOOD TO SACK OUT. OFF THEY GO - AIR DOWN AND HIT THE BEACH!

    WELL, THE REST OF THE STORY WAS ALMOST TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE. THE REST OF MAY WAS NON-STOP SCHOOLIE ACTION ON LIGHT TACKLE WITH A FEW KEEPERS EACH WEEK TO KEEP THINGS INTERESTING.THE BIG PAYOFF FOR THEIR MISSION WAS THE SECOND WEEK IN JUNE WHEN THE BEACHES ARE USUALLY CLOSED FOR THE "FIRST HATCH". THIS YEAR, THE ORV TRAILS REMAINED OPEN AND THE BIG FISH ARRIVED RIGHT ON SCHEDULE. FOR THE NEXT TEN DAYS, T-BONE AND HIS LIFE-LONG FISHING PARTNER, FINBAR, ABSOLUTELY HAMMERED THEM.THEY FISHED THE DAWN TIDES, SLEPT A FEW HOURS, THEN FISHED THE NIGHT TIDES UNTIL THEY DROPPED ON THE SAND, LAUGHING LIKE THEY WERE 12 AND 13 YEARS OLD AGAIN. IT WAS TRULY LIKE DAYS OF OLD. THERE WERE COUNTLESS STRIPERS OVER 30 LBS. AND SEVERAL INTO THE 40'S.

    THEY EVEN HAD THE OPPORTUNITY (AND JOY) TO STRIKE UP A CONVERSATION WITH ONE OF THE BIRD GIRLS. SHE SADLY EXPLAINED THAT IT WAS THE WORST YEAR EVER FOR PLOVER PRODUCTION. THEY WERE FLYING IN SEVERAL SCIENTISTS (IN PRIVATE LEAR JETS)  FROM D.C. TO HELP FIGURE IT OUT. SO FAR, SHE SAID, IT LOOKS LIKE PREDATORS HAD HARASSED THE ADULT BIRDS, CAUSING THEM TO LEAVE THE NESTS AND ALLOWING THE EGGS TO COOL DOWN. SHE ALSO CONFIDED THAT THE PARK SERVICE AND DFW WERE DRAFTING A PLAN TO POISON THE PREDATORS, LIKE THEY DID WITH THE GULLS ON MONOMOY AND THE CROWS IN OTHER AREAS ON THE CAPE. NOT TO MENTION THE POISONING AND SLAUGHTER OF THE CARP IN PILGRIM LAKE IN TRURO. AND THEN WATCHING THE GULLS CRASHING DOWN ONTO RTE. 6 AFTER FEEDING ON THE POISONED CARP!

     LATER THAT SAME YEAR, THE BROTHERS RETURNED TO THE OUTER CAPE FOR THE FALL RUN. THEY PREFERRED MID-SEPTEMBER THROUGH MID-OCTOBER. SEPT. 17th WAS T-BONE'S FAVORITE DATE. IT WAS ON THAT DAY MANY YEARS AGO THAT HE WADED OUT TO LONG BAR AT NAUSET BEACH JUST AS THE SUN WAS GOING DOWN. AT DAWN, HE WAS PHOTOGRAPHED KNEELING NEXT TO STACK OF BASS THAT LATER WEIGHED IN AT 508LBS.

    THIS YEAR, HOWEVER, THE FALL RUN WAS KIND OF SLOW. THEY HAD A FEW REALLY GOOD NIGHTS BUT THE DAWN AND DAY-TIME FISHING WAS WAY OFF. WHAT THEY DID NOTICE WAS A MARKED INCREASE IN THE SEAL POPULATION. EACH OF THEM HAD LOST FISH TO THE FILTHY SEA-RATS.THEY ALSO SAW QUITE A FEW BASS RACKS ON THE BEACH WITH THE SPINES CHEWED OFF TO THE HEADS - OBVIOUS SEAL KILLS. IT ALSO SUCKED TO HAVE THEM FOLLOWING YOU DOWN THE BEACH - RESEMBLING ALIENS STARING AT YOU. THE FINAL BLOW WAS GOING DOWN TO HIGH HEAD AND SEEING HUNDREDS OF THE FILTHY CREATURES HAULED OUT AT A ONCE - PRODUCTIVE FISHING SPOT. ANOTHER HUNDRED WERE IN THE WATER, MILLING ABOUT IN THEIR OWN WASTE, SURROUNDED BY A HUGE SLICK OF BROWN, OILY WATER. THE STENCH DROVE THE BROTHERS BACK TO THEIR TRUCKS AND LOOKING FOR GREENER PASTURES.

   AND SO, BY THE END OF THEIR FALL FISHING TRIPS,THE BROTHERS WERE HATCHING (NO PUN INTENDED) A PLAN TO "DEAL WITH THE SEALS" STAY TUNED FOR THE NEXT "T-BONE AND FINBAR WISHFUL FICTION".....

.

    SOME OF THE PRECEDING STORY IS PURE FICTION AND THE AUTHOR STRONGLY ADVISES AGAINST ANY ILLEGAL ACTIVITY. THE PENALTY FOR ANY ILLEGAL ACTIONS AGAINST PROTECTED OR ENDANGERED/THREATENED WILDLIFE IS MUCH MORE SEVERE THAN IF YOU HARMED A HUMAN BEING.

 

    P.S. ALWAYS USE TICK PREVENTION WHEN CRAWLING IN THE DUNES.... 

 

 

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I RECENTLY CAME ACROSS THIS SHORT STORY BY AN ANONYMOUS AUTHOR. I THOUGHT THE MEMBERS COULD RELATE....

      IT WAS SOMETIME IN THE 70'S THAT THE BROTHERS DISCOVERED THE PHENOMENAL SURF FISHING ON CAPE COD.THEY HAD SOMEHOW STUMBLED ONTO NAUSET BEACH AND SOON BECAME OBSESSED WITH NIGHT FISHING CHATHAM INLET TO NAUSET INLET AND ALL POINTS IN BETWEEN. OVER THE YEARS, THEY PLUGGED AND EELED THEIR WAY FROM ORLEANS THROUGH EASTHAM, WELLFLEET, TRURO AND ON TO P'TOWN.

    LIFE WAS GOOD AND IT SOON BECAME SO MUCH MORE THAN CATCHING STRIPED BASS. EATING, SLEEPING AND LIVING ON THE SAND BECAME THE BEST PART OF THEIR LIVES. MEETING SOME GREAT FRIENDS AND SHARING ADVENTURES WITH THEM WAS ALSO A BIG PART OF THIS TRULY WONDERFUL EXPERIENCE. THE FREEDOM TO RUN THE BEACH WAS THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF THIS LIFESTYLE.

   AND THEN CAME THE BIRDS! AND THEN CAME ALL THE RULES AND THE MILES AND MILES OF SIGNS AND TWINE AND BEACH CLOSINGS. EVERYONE COMPLAINED, WROTE LETTERS AND ATTENDED HEARINGS AND MEETINGS - AND IT JUST GOT WORSE AND WORSE.

   THAT IS WHEN THE BROTHERS "FINBAR AND T-BONE" DECIDED SOMETHING HAD TO BE DONE. FINBAR HAD NOTICED THAT THEY ONLY SHUT THE BEACHES DOWN WHEN THE FIRST BIRDS ACTUALLY HATCHED. THEY EVEN HAD THE BIRD PEOPLE WATCHING EVERY NEST, WAITING FOR THE BLESSED EVENT. SO....WHAT IF THEY NEVER HATCHED? T-BONE, A FORMER MARINE, WANTED TO GO ON NIGHT RECON AND CRUSH THE EGGS. FINBAR, THE THINKER, KNEW THEIR HAD TO BE A BETTER WAY. THEY HAD TO PREVENT THE HATCH WITHOUT LEAVING ANY EVIDENCE OF TAMPERING. AND SO, A PLAN WAS "HATCHED".                                                                                               IT WAS JUST AFTER MIDNIGHT ON A COOL MIDWEEK NIGHT IN MAY WHEN TWO SILENT FIGURES CROSSED THE HIGHWAY AND DISAPPEARED OVER THE DUNES HEADED FOR THE ABANDONED BEACH.THEY WERE DRESSED IN SAND/CAMO AND CARRIED ONLY BACKPACKS AND NECKLIGHTS. IN THE BACKPACKS WERE A COUPLE ENERGY BARS, SOME BOTTLED WATER AND SEVERAL FREON TYPE FIRE EXTINGUISHERS. THE PLAN WAS TO FLASH-FREEZE THE EGGS. THIS WOULD ALMOST CERTAINLY STOP THEM FROM HATCHING AND, HOPEFULLY, THE PARENT BIRDS WOULD CONTINUE TO SIT ON THEM RATHER THAN RE-NEST AND LAY NEW ONES.THE BROTHERS ALSO HOPED THE FREON WOULD NOT LEAVE ANY EVIDENCE OF TAMPERING.

    THERE WERE A TOTAL OF 13 NESTS WHICH, THANKS TO THE BIRDOPHILES, WERE EASILY FOUND CENTERED INSIDE THEIR PROTECTIVE CAGES. THEY CAREFULLY LIFTED THE CAGES AND SPRAYED EACH EGG FOR 10 SECONDS. AS THEY BACKED AWAY FROM THE NESTS, THEY BRUSHED THE SAND SMOOTH. THEN FINBAR(THE THINKING ONE), MADE FOX AND RACCOON TRACKS WITH SOME FEET HE HAD ACQUIRED FROM A TAXIDERMIST FRIEND. ONCE THE DEED WAS DONE, THE BROTHERS HIKED OVER THE DUNES AND ACROSS THE HIGHWAY TO THEIR HIDDEN TRUCKS. IT WAS ALMOST DAYBREAK AND THE TIDE WAS LOW INCOMING WITH A BUILDING SOUTHWEST WIND. AS TIRED AS THEY WERE, THESE CONDITIONS WERE JUST TOO GOOD TO SACK OUT. OFF THEY GO - AIR DOWN AND HIT THE BEACH!

    WELL, THE REST OF THE STORY WAS ALMOST TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE. THE REST OF MAY WAS NON-STOP SCHOOLIE ACTION ON LIGHT TACKLE WITH A FEW KEEPERS EACH WEEK TO KEEP THINGS INTERESTING.THE BIG PAYOFF FOR THEIR MISSION WAS THE SECOND WEEK IN JUNE WHEN THE BEACHES ARE USUALLY CLOSED FOR THE "FIRST HATCH". THIS YEAR, THE ORV TRAILS REMAINED OPEN AND THE BIG FISH ARRIVED RIGHT ON SCHEDULE. FOR THE NEXT TEN DAYS, T-BONE AND HIS LIFE-LONG FISHING PARTNER, FINBAR, ABSOLUTELY HAMMERED THEM.THEY FISHED THE DAWN TIDES, SLEPT A FEW HOURS, THEN FISHED THE NIGHT TIDES UNTIL THEY DROPPED ON THE SAND, LAUGHING LIKE THEY WERE 12 AND 13 YEARS OLD AGAIN. IT WAS TRULY LIKE DAYS OF OLD. THERE WERE COUNTLESS STRIPERS OVER 30 LBS. AND SEVERAL INTO THE 40'S.

    THEY EVEN HAD THE OPPORTUNITY (AND JOY) TO STRIKE UP A CONVERSATION WITH ONE OF THE BIRD GIRLS. SHE SADLY EXPLAINED THAT IT WAS THE WORST YEAR EVER FOR PLOVER PRODUCTION. THEY WERE FLYING IN SEVERAL SCIENTISTS (IN PRIVATE LEAR JETS)  FROM D.C. TO HELP FIGURE IT OUT. SO FAR, SHE SAID, IT LOOKS LIKE PREDATORS HAD HARASSED THE ADULT BIRDS, CAUSING THEM TO LEAVE THE NESTS AND ALLOWING THE EGGS TO COOL DOWN. SHE ALSO CONFIDED THAT THE PARK SERVICE AND DFW WERE DRAFTING A PLAN TO POISON THE PREDATORS, LIKE THEY DID WITH THE GULLS ON MONOMOY AND THE CROWS IN OTHER AREAS ON THE CAPE. NOT TO MENTION THE POISONING AND SLAUGHTER OF THE CARP IN PILGRIM LAKE IN TRURO. AND THEN WATCHING THE GULLS CRASHING DOWN ONTO RTE. 6 AFTER FEEDING ON THE POISONED CARP!

     LATER THAT SAME YEAR, THE BROTHERS RETURNED TO THE OUTER CAPE FOR THE FALL RUN. THEY PREFERRED MID-SEPTEMBER THROUGH MID-OCTOBER. SEPT. 17th WAS T-BONE'S FAVORITE DATE. IT WAS ON THAT DAY MANY YEARS AGO THAT HE WADED OUT TO LONG BAR AT NAUSET BEACH JUST AS THE SUN WAS GOING DOWN. AT DAWN, HE WAS PHOTOGRAPHED KNEELING NEXT TO STACK OF BASS THAT LATER WEIGHED IN AT 508LBS.

    THIS YEAR, HOWEVER, THE FALL RUN WAS KIND OF SLOW. THEY HAD A FEW REALLY GOOD NIGHTS BUT THE DAWN AND DAY-TIME FISHING WAS WAY OFF. WHAT THEY DID NOTICE WAS A MARKED INCREASE IN THE SEAL POPULATION. EACH OF THEM HAD LOST FISH TO THE FILTHY SEA-RATS.THEY ALSO SAW QUITE A FEW BASS RACKS ON THE BEACH WITH THE SPINES CHEWED OFF TO THE HEADS - OBVIOUS SEAL KILLS. IT ALSO SUCKED TO HAVE THEM FOLLOWING YOU DOWN THE BEACH - RESEMBLING ALIENS STARING AT YOU. THE FINAL BLOW WAS GOING DOWN TO HIGH HEAD AND SEEING HUNDREDS OF THE FILTHY CREATURES HAULED OUT AT A ONCE - PRODUCTIVE FISHING SPOT. ANOTHER HUNDRED WERE IN THE WATER, MILLING ABOUT IN THEIR OWN WASTE, SURROUNDED BY A HUGE SLICK OF BROWN, OILY WATER. THE STENCH DROVE THE BROTHERS BACK TO THEIR TRUCKS AND LOOKING FOR GREENER PASTURES.

   AND SO, BY THE END OF THEIR FALL FISHING TRIPS,THE BROTHERS WERE HATCHING (NO PUN INTENDED) A PLAN TO "DEAL WITH THE SEALS" STAY TUNED FOR THE NEXT "T-BONE AND FINBAR WISHFUL FICTION".....

.

    SOME OF THE PRECEDING STORY IS PURE FICTION AND THE AUTHOR STRONGLY ADVISES AGAINST ANY ILLEGAL ACTIVITY. THE PENALTY FOR ANY ILLEGAL ACTIONS AGAINST PROTECTED OR ENDANGERED/THREATENED WILDLIFE IS MUCH MORE SEVERE THAN IF YOU HARMED A HUMAN BEING.

 

    P.S. ALWAYS USE TICK PREVENTION WHEN CRAWLING IN THE DUNES.... 

Someone is smoking some good chit

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Jonesy, Sorry about the caps-was thinking about us old guys with poor vision......won't happen again.

 

OG, the author assures me he is drug-free but cannot rule out flash-backs.

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