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Cortez The Killie Killer

Family visiting... Bitchin about stuff from 50 years ago....

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I came home early to cook for my wife's cousins who are visiting. They are all gathered around the kitchen table re-living crap from 40 & 50 years ago. I called my wife to ask where she was and she said that she might work late. :mad: She's heard it all before! Thank God I stopped and bought wine, beer and vodka. My retreat to this computer is accompanied by two of the three. The home made limoncello will make an appearance later.

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Oh, one of the bunch could tear it up! The others will still be complaining about not being invited to some birthday party in 1952 or that so-n-so's daughter is a disgrace because she didnt send a Mass Card when mommy died... I'm opening that limoncello now.

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We've got a cute collection of them in town come late June. If I have to hear the ******* story of Uncle Michael burying his Firebird in a foundation (because he was wrecked and wrapped it around a phone pole) one more time I'm gonna wig out. Of course that beats the uncles story about burning down the original farm house to collect insurance... :kook:

 

We're talking real issues here fellers....

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They need to attend that Wednesday sex group of yours, give them something new to talk about. :th:

 

I just moderate and give a little back to the community. I wish that I could tell the cousins some stories ---- it would curl their toes!

 

It turned into a good night --- learned many things about my wife's family that I never knew. :read: For example: Cousin so-n-so was 60 years old when he learned that his father was not his father but his grandfather and that his brother was his father.

 

And then the night took a turn: One cousin brought Easter chocolate for my kids (good thing since I ate the last bunny yesterday afternoon). However, she left the bag of chocolate hanging on a door knob. One of the dogs ripped the bottom of the bag and made off with a bunny. About 2AM, I sensed something wrong and discovered the dog under my bed throwing up ---- a huge mess of chocolate vomit. The only good thing was that it smelled like chocolate and not ****. Smelled good enough to eat. The dog looked ok. Called the emergency vet and was told that her having puked was the best thing. Simply watch her. So, from 2 - 3am I was cleaning chocolate out of the carpet and baby sitting the dog. At 5AM I was still awake and went to workout.

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I had a customer several years back who was buying a dozen gravel rakes, 12 push brooms and a dozen shovels. When I asked him was his purchase tax exempt he said no. He told me that his family was coming down to visit and that he had work for them to do :shock: This was during thanksgiving time :confused: I told him that his family didn't visit him much and he just smiled ;)

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I just moderate and give a little back to the community. I wish that I could tell the cousins some stories ---- it would curl their toes!

 

It turned into a good night --- learned many things about my wife's family that I never knew. :read: For example: Cousin so-n-so was 60 years old when he learned that his father was not his father but his grandfather and that his brother was his father.

 

And then the night took a turn: One cousin brought Easter chocolate for my kids (good thing since I ate the last bunny yesterday afternoon). However, she left the bag of chocolate hanging on a door knob. One of the dogs ripped the bottom of the bag and made off with a bunny. About 2AM, I sensed something wrong and discovered the dog under my bed throwing up ---- a huge mess of chocolate vomit. The only good thing was that it smelled like chocolate and not ****. Smelled good enough to eat. The dog looked ok. Called the emergency vet and was told that her having puked was the best thing. Simply watch her. So, from 2 - 3am I was cleaning chocolate out of the carpet and baby sitting the dog. At 5AM I was still awake and went to workout.

 

You are lucky the dog is OK, chocolate and coffee are 2 poisons for dogs.

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