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Scott Charlton

A favour

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April 1st is right around the corner. Please, it would mean the world to me, if everyone could avoid subjects like

 

"The bite is on!"

 

or

 

"Stripers are in Wicked early this year!" as they hold pictures of trophy fish

 

Also, perhaps avoiding headlines like

 

"Benefactor donates $1,000 for every Striped bass returned alive. Just tell him your number and writes you a check!"

 

 

I simply say this because:

 

* It has been one H@!#! of a long winter, and I am jonesing BIG time for a bite

* I'm not smart. I will believe every one of those headlines. I will start to salivate. I will grab my gear, throw it in my car, drive down streets that still have several inches of snow on them. Get to the beach. Watch my hands go numb as I try to gear up, walk into the water (too excited to wear waders), loose all sensation from my waste down. I will do all of that until it clicks: It's April fools day.

 

So please. Please...I'm asking from the bottom of my heart. This April Fools day, don't do something that will make a fat middle aged man shiver in his timbers by the time he realized that he is in fact the oldest fool there is.

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